Becoming Selfless Through Selfishness

Lord Shiva in Blue Mountains

When most people think of spirituality, words like compassion, kindness, and selflessness come to mind. And while that is true, I discovered something on my journey that may sound contradictory:

I had to become selfish before I could truly become selfless.

Not selfish in the worldly sense — not chasing money, fame, or personal gain. But selfish in a spiritual sense — selfish for my soul’s deepest longing… the longing to return to God.

And strangely enough, that kind of spiritual selfishness is exactly what opened the door to real selflessness.

The Soul vs. The Mind

On the spiritual path, desire plays a powerful role. If you don’t have the desire to merge with the Divine, the path won’t truly unfold for you. But if you do have it, you must guard it carefully.

Here’s why:

• The soul longs for God.

• The mind — with its karmas, old patterns, and attachments — constantly pulls us back into the material world.

This is how the world is designed. God gave us freedom, choices, and enjoyments. But the moment our mind clings to them, we get bound again.

That is why scriptures say that at the time of death, whatever is on your mind will determine where your consciousness goes. If we haven’t lived in devotion, it’s almost impossible to remember God in that final moment.

This is where the soul vs. mind conflict becomes very real — the soul wants liberation, while the mind and the body wants comfort, pleasure, and familiarity.

My Realization

Through meditation practice, I began to notice this tug-of-war within me. My soul wanted God, but my mind was often distracted by work, money, and even good intentions like helping others.

Whenever I drifted, meditation reminded me: Keep God at the center. Even while working, remember Him.

And something amazing happened — when my awareness stayed with God, the work flowed by itself. I was no longer the doer. Life was simply happening through me.

It felt selfish at first — choosing God over everything else. But in time, that very selfishness made me lighter. My attachments started falling away. And with that, compassion, acceptance, and love for others began to rise naturally.

This was my first glimpse of what God realization truly means — when the focus shifts from outcomes to presence, from ego to Divine flow.

Why Understanding Ourselves Changes Everything

Here’s what I’ve come to see:

Only when we truly understand our own struggles can we understand the struggles of others. That understanding turns into compassion and love.

The world is always a mirror.

• If we are restless inside, the world feels restless.

• If we are unfulfilled, we keep attracting situations that highlight that emptiness.

• If we carry peace and love within, the same reflects back to us through the people and situations around us.

So when we become “selfish” for the soul — by giving ourselves fully to God — the mirror shifts. The world reflects peace, compassion, and connection because that’s what we now carry inside.

This is how becoming selfless through selfishness works. The more we honor the soul’s longing for God, the more naturally selfless we become in the outer world.

The Point of It All

This is the essence of the Bhagavad Gita and so many spiritual teachings:

When we root ourselves in God’s love, selflessness is no longer an effort. It flows effortlessly. Service, kindness, and compassion become natural, because the heart is already full.

So yes — being selfish for the soul may sound strange. But that selfishness is exactly what transforms us into people who can truly serve, love, and embrace the world as it is.

Final Reflection

Ask yourself: What is my soul truly longing for?

And am I giving it the space to love God first?

Because only then, through this deep spiritual selfishness, can we discover the purest form of selflessness.

If this reflection resonates with you and you’d like to go deeper, I guide people through past life regression therapy, one-to-one spiritual mentoring, and meditation practices to help them master their mind, heal karmic patterns, and connect with the Divine.

You can learn more about my work and book a session here: https://www.awakenwithsanya.com